Pixar's Inside Out: The Emotional Journey of Letting Go

Full disclosure here, when my wife, my daughter and myself sat down to watch Pixar’s Inside Out, we literally had no idea that what was to transpire during and after the film was even coming. I think Bing-Bong is probably all I would have to say and most of you that are a bit tougher than I am would probably say, “Awwww.” And those of you who are a bit more like me emotionally may have to cover your mouth, hold out your hand in protest and try to make the memories stop flooding your brain. Pixar have always been known for telling adult stories that challenge you inside the confines of cute, bubbly and spritely characters you connect with. It only makes sense with Inside Out that the film would literally take my emotional insides and practically rip them out. In all fairness, what Pixar has done with this film is important…not just for the sake of cinema, but for families that desperately need to understand one another more and then give them an outlet to let some emotions go. Again…Bing-Bong. But enough about that, let’s get to the heart of this film and what I think it means and what I think it can do for you and your teenager.

Pixar’s Inside Out is more than just an animated film—it’s an emotional roadmap through the mind of an 11-year-old girl, Riley, as she navigates the upheaval of moving to a new city. But for parents watching the film, it resonates on a much deeper level. Beneath the colorful characters representing Joy, Sadness, Anger, Fear, and Disgust lies a poignant truth: watching your child grow into a teenager is both beautiful and heartbreaking. As their son or daughter begin to lose the innocence of childhood, parents are often left grappling with a swirl of emotions that closely mirror those happening inside Riley’s mind.

From the moment our children are born, we are their world—their comfort, their joy, their compass. The responsibility of not only our kid’s safety but also their future weighs heavily on even the most experienced of parents. I say experienced, but every child is different just like every human is different. As any parent with multiple kids knows, one may have slept all the time as an infant while the other never slept at all and ran around constantly.

As our kids enter adolescence though, something begins to shift. They become more independent, more complex, and sometimes more distant. Inside Out captures this shift with remarkable honesty. The film opens with Joy in command, painting childhood as a time of light-heartedness and simplicity. But as Riley faces change—moving away from friends, adjusting to a new home and school—Sadness starts to take a more active role. This transition parallels what many parents experience as their once-bubbly children begin to withdraw, face new challenges, and express a wider range of emotions. Sometimes what we parents initially see as our teenager acting out or being overly emotional is more multi-faceted than that. In part, it’s their attempt to stretch their wings a bit and try out this “independence” thing. The second part, and the most vital for any parent to be cognizant of, is that when our teens do this it can be a sort of cry for help. When faced with the innate desire we all have of being out on our own and making our own decisions, we oftentimes find ourselves smacked in the face pretty hard with the realities and truths that life deals out. When we were younger we could run home to Mom or Dad and find shelter in their arms. But when we are teens and we are trying to be our own man or woman, to run home and hide behind Mom and Dad doesn’t feel like a suitable option. Confused, frustrated and sometimes a bit hopeless, a teenager may lash out and say hurtful things. If we, as parents, are being completely honest with ourselves we will remember that it is and always has been easier to hurt those we love and are closest too than some rando down the street.

One of the most profound moments in the film is when Riley’s core memories—once glowing with the bright yellow hue of joy—begin to turn blue. This shift is symbolic not only for Riley, but also for the parent watching: a reminder that the days of laughter and light are giving way to something more complicated. As Riley’s emotions grow in depth, so do the feelings of the parents who raised her. There is a subtle mourning that takes place—the mourning of a child’s innocence, of simpler times, of complete dependence and trust. This is not only difficult for a teenager but for the parent who, try as they might not to show it, can’t help but live a little vicariously through their children. Long gone are the days of endless play, lazy summer days and the kind of care-free approach that early childhood brings. The heartbreak for the parents can sometimes stem from wanting their child to never have to grow up…to be able to be care-free forever instead of having to deal with rotten bosses, expensive car payments and the loss of those older than us as they age.

Like Riley, parents don’t always have a roadmap for what they’re feeling. There is pride in watching your child grow stronger, smarter, and more self-aware, but there’s also fear—fear of losing connection, fear of not being needed, and fear of watching your child suffer in ways you can’t fix with a hug or a bedtime story. These emotions—much like the characters in Riley’s mind—battle for space. Joy wants to hold on to the good times, while Sadness whispers reminders of what’s been lost. Fear asks, “Am I still a good parent?” Disgust scoffs at the idea of letting go, and Anger roars when doors start closing and communication starts to falter.

Perhaps the most touching theme in Inside Out is the realization that sadness is not a flaw, but a necessary part of growth. For Riley, sadness becomes the key to healing and reconnection. For parents, embracing their own sadness becomes essential too. The heartache of watching a child grow up isn’t something to “get over,” but rather something to acknowledge and honor. It’s okay to miss the days of bedtime snuggles and little hands that reached for yours without hesitation. It’s okay to feel a pang of loss when your child chooses friends over family, or when they no longer need your help in quite the same way.

And yet, like in the film, this isn’t the end—it’s a transformation. The joy of parenting evolves. It moves from the simplicity of tickle fights and coloring books to the deeper, more complex satisfaction of watching your child become who they’re meant to be. The core memories may not be as bright, but they’re richer, infused with a blend of joy, sorrow, pride, and love.

The final scenes of Inside Out offer a sense of hope. Riley reconnects with her parents—not as the child she once was, but as a growing individual who is learning to make sense of her feelings. This is what parents, too, must learn to do: to shift from being the center of their child’s world to being a steady presence in the background, offering guidance, support, and unconditional love.And here, my dear teenagers out there in podcast land, is where you come in. Whereas your parents spent a great deal of your early life sacrificing, providing and showing patience  so you could grow into the young man or young woman you are becoming…it is now time for you to honor that. Only you can be the one to give your parents a little patience when they don’t quite know what to say to you. After all, at least they’re trying, right? Only you can be the one that sacrifices some of your time to check in with your folks and take a moment and really listen to what they’re saying. After all, sometimes we all mean a little something different than the words that leave our mouths. And lastly, only you can be the one to provide for your parents…not in a financial way, but in giving and showing love to them when you realize that—like yourself—they aren’t perfect and that they don’t need to be in order to be important to you.

In the end, Inside Out reminds us that growing up is not just hard on the child—it’s hard on the parent too. But if we embrace the full spectrum of emotion, both theirs and ours, we can find peace in the process. We can learn that letting go doesn't mean losing connection—it means making room for a new kind of bond, one built on mutual understanding and the quiet, enduring strength of love. So, if you’re brave enough to see it again, I challenge you to watch Inside Out and kind of do a bit of Freaky Friday with your emotions as you watch. Teens, watch the film as if you were the parents and Moms and Dads, watch the film as if you were still Riley. Maybe the connection you all will share is that we are all going through something and we don’t always have the answers, but together through love and patience, we can still help each other out…even when we’ve lost our way a little bit.Thank you for listening today. As always, watch films deeper, listen closer and search for a deeper meaning than what’s on the surface. I’ll see you next time.